This week I was commiserating with another mother of a young child, and we were both noting how hard parenting can be at times. She confided that sometimes, when things are particularly crazy, she just sings about it. That morning, she found herself singing, “This morning is insane!” Although she was complaining, somehow singing about it made her loosen up and feel better about the whole thing.
Her tip reminded me of one of the collects from Mepkin Abbey. At midday prayer one day, one of the collects was a petition asking God to renew our sense of purpose and use the rest of the day for good. I remember thinking how full of grace that collect was – like a spiritual “do over.” I remember thinking that whatever I had accomplished (or not accomplished) in the morning did not have to affect how the rest of the day took shape. At that moment, in that prayer, I found a new sense of freedom – as if I was given permission to not have to wait until tomorrow to start over, but to start over right then and there.
Picture courtesy of http://www.carbonthree.com.
Sometimes I think we could all stand to give ourselves a spiritual “do over.” Instead of beating ourselves up for our failures, or wallowing in a bad mood because of something someone else said or did to us, we can turn it all over to God and simply start again. Truthfully, I imagine God is a bit amused by our inability to give ourselves “do overs.” Our God is a God marked by abundant love, forgiveness, and grace. Our God is all about the “do over.” When we forget that, our image of God then becomes a cold, calculating, scorekeeping God. That is not the God we know. Instead, our God is a God who is continually welcoming us into God’s arms. I am reminded of Jesus’ words, as he lamented over Jerusalem, “How often have I desired to gather your children together as a hen gathers her brood under her wings, and you were not willing!” Mt. 23.37
Perhaps this week, we might consider how we might allow Jesus to gather us under his wing, to start again living into God’s graciousness instead of wallowing in our own sense of failure or frustration. Whether at the end of the day, in the middle of the day, or even after breakfast, the “do over” is available at all times from the God who longs to gather us.
This month has been one of those months at church that has been super busy. Three out of four Saturdays have had events, and Sundays have been full too. That alone can be exhausting, as many of us have commiserated. But I was thinking about it today, and the truth is that all of the things we are doing are a big deal. I think that some of our exhaustion is not just because our weekends have been full, but that the things that have been filling our time are emotionally and spiritually significant.
When I went on a choral pilgrimage in England a couple of years ago, I remember finding that each day I had a new favorite sacred space. Not once did we visit a place and I say, “Oh, well that one wasn’t as good as yesterday.” They all blew me away, and I had such a hard time naming a favorite when I returned home.
This year my Lenten discipline has been a lot more ambiguous than in years past. I have been working on being attentive and more present in my life and in my ministry. Like I said, ambiguous. But in some ways, the practice has been quite a blessing. Instead of busying myself with a practice or suffering through giving something up (and probably complaining about either), this year I have been able to step back and see what is working and what really is not.
Blessed to be a blessing. This is the theme that the stewardship team has adopted this year as we begin to reflect on the abundant blessings in our lives and discern how we might use those blessings to be a blessing to others. I have had the great pleasure of working with six other parishioners from St. Margaret’s since this summer, and we have all been discerning how our relationship with God and money are connected. We have debated and discussed whether and how our faithful financial stewardship impacts our relationship with God. We have helped one another draw the connections between our relationship with money and our relationship with God. This work is on-going among us, as we continue to pray through this issue as we discern our own pledges this year. Some of us have already witnessed how sacrificial giving can be life giving. Others of us wonder how our attitude toward money can impact our relationship with God. And so we continue to pray – for our own discernment, for each other’s discernment, and for St. Margaret’s. We know that St. Margaret’s has been a blessing to us, and so we both want to be a blessing to St. Margaret’s, and we want St. Margaret’s to be a blessing to our community. We invite you into this circle of blessing!
Seeking and Serving 