Category Archives: reflection

On Faith, Wellness, and Reality…

21 Wednesday Oct 2026

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Photo credit: https://www.sjcfl.us/employee-connection/wellness/

One of the questions the bishop asks a priest in their ordination vows is, “Will you do your best to pattern your life and that of your family in accordance with the teachings of Christ, so that you may be a wholesome example to your people?”  I remember when my bishop asked me that question over 16 years ago how daunting that question felt – not only for myself but also for my family.  Having grown up as a preacher’s kid, I remember thinking how much pressure that invitation felt:  for the whole family to be a wholesome example to the church. 

So, when the Church invited clergy and their spouses to attend a Wellness Conference last week, focusing on both physical and financial wellness, I had a revelation in one of those sessions:  this is what that promise was all about.  Tending to my family’s physical and financial wellness is patterning our life as an example.  And so are a lot of other things we do:  navigating parenting, tending to our marriage, working on my own physical, spiritual, and mental health.  Giving attention to all those areas are ways that we model faithful living.  And perhaps most importantly, being honest about the struggles, upfront about the good and the bad days, and inviting others to share their truth too creates the foundation where we can all more honestly journey in the life of faith authentically and encouragingly. 

My hope is that we do that work together in preaching and teaching too.  I cannot count the number of times someone has said to me after a church service, “That sermon was tough!  You gave me a lot to think about.”  My response is always the same, “Just remember, every sermon I preach is addressed to me too!”  If the words of Jesus or the story of God is challenging to you, you better believe those same things are challenging to me as well.  My hope is that by naming how hard they are, I am doing my work of being a wholesome example. 

All that is to say, I invite you to take an honest look at your witness to others (yes, even if you’re not a priest, others are looking at your life as your Christian witness).  Are you tending to your own wellness:  physical, spiritual, mental, financial?  Are you being open and honest about where your faith pinches and where you still struggle to make sense of it all?  Being a wholesome example doesn’t mean only showing others a “perfect life.”  Being a wholesome example means revealing your humanity and your desire to love God even when your capacity feels diminished.  Many more people will feel invited into a journey of faith if they feel like they can do that without trying to be perfect – just wholesome.

On Hidden Blessings…

07 Wednesday Oct 2026

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Photo credit: Jennifer Andrews-Weckerly; reuse with permission only.

This week I got a last minute invitation:  a friend of our parish is building a new home for their family, and the house is finally framed and closed in.  In a matter of days, the drywall will be hung.  In that brief window, the friend sent out an SOS to friends of faith – come by and write a scripture verse, a blessing, a prayer, or a book quote on the studs before they are hidden away by drywall, tape, paint, and artwork. 

In looking around the house, and all those words of blessing and care, I was thinking about how much a house hides.  All those words of blessing will be hidden very soon.  But eventually, those walls will also witness life’s sorrows and joys, life’s heartbreaks and cheers, life’s hardships and abundance.  Someday, new generations will warm the home with their squeals and laughter.  Renovations may be made, new paint may be applied, new pictures may be hung.  All that life – from the blessings on the studs, to the skid marks left by forbidden scooters, to the sighs of contentment that linger in the air – all that life, seen and unseen, will create a beautiful breathing container of the abundance of blessing. 

As I reflected on those studs, I wondered how often we get to think about our lives in the same way.  We can’t really write blessings on the insides of our bodies, but our bodies carry the markers of a sacred life led too.  The scar from playing in the old oak tree or from a life-improving surgery, the relationships that grew our heart’s capacity to love, the mentors who inspired our brains to interpret life differently, to the worship that got us out of our bodies enough to see blessing.  It is quite easy to treat the body as a vessel to live life or for a home to be a place to sleep, eat, and be cleansed.  But neither our bodies nor our homes are that simple.  They hold the markers our whole lives.

I wonder how you might honor those vessels today.  Maybe, as one of my fitness instructors says, you can thank your body for allowing you to function today.  Maybe, you can pause on a stairwell and give thanks for the millions of times feet have tread on those stairs.  Or maybe, you look at your body, or your home, and give thanks for signs of God’s presence, grace, and blessing. 

On New Clothes and Neighbors…

30 Wednesday Sep 2026

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Photo credit: https://www.catholic.com/qa/what-does-loving-your-neighbor-as-yourself-entail

In high school, my younger brother was the “cool one.”  He introduced me to new music, new trends, and new comedies.  In my senior year of high school, he convinced our parents to let me take the two of us to a concert.  I was excited to hear the music, but my brother pulled me aside to tell me that I could not wear clothes from my normal wardrobe.  As we headed out the door, I looked nothing like what I normally looked like; I felt as though I was in a costume of sorts.  And he was right – I fit into the crowd much better in his chosen clothes than anything out of my own closet.  It was a strange experiment in trying on the identity of another group of people.

Imagine my deja vu when, almost thirty years later, my daughter invited me to join her at a concert of music that I do not follow.  Although she was happy to have me join her, she too insisted that I borrow some clothes from her so that I would better fit in with the concert crowd.  I was grateful for the help, but I remember that same feeling of trying on an identity that was not my own. 

I have been thinking that those two experiences are fairly uncommon.  In general, we figure out our style – our sense of identity – and we live our daily lives in those “clothes.”  Those clothes communicate something about us, and often make navigating in and out of work, social engagements, and community functions relatively seamless.  In fact, when others imagine us, they probably imagine us in the style of clothing we normally wear – whether preppy, athletic, bohemian, or something else.  What I got at that two concerts was a rare taste of what it would be like to move in the world with a different sense of identity – and to connect more comfortably with people whose identity is quite different than mine.

I wonder how often in life we miss out on unique connections with people unlike ourselves because we get so set in or comfortable with our own identity.  I’m not arguing that we should try to pretend or be something we are not.  I am encouraging us to explore what unintentional, or maybe even unconscious, barriers we have put up between ourselves and others.  The core commandments Jesus summarized for us were to love God and love neighbor.  I wonder how much we limit our love of neighbor by simply staying in our comfort zones.  What “new clothes” might you try on today to help you connect with someone you have simply seen as “other” and not as “neighbor”?

On Change and Bread…

16 Wednesday Sep 2026

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Photo credit: https://foragersofhappiness.com/beginner-sourdough-bread-recipe/

On Sundays at church, we’ve been reading our way through Genesis and Exodus.  Last week we just read about the parting of the Red Sea.  This coming week, we find the freed people of Israel complaining about hunger.  In Exodus 16.3, the people of God complain, “If only we had died by the hand of the Lord in the land of Egypt, when we sat by the fleshpots and ate our fill of bread; for you have brought us out into this wilderness to kill this whole assembly with hunger.” 

These faithful people went through a brutal, oppressive enslavement and witnessed a miraculous freeing by God – walking through a parted sea while their enemies were crushed.  They have everything they ever wanted – true freedom.  And yet, here they are, at the first sign of adversity, looking longingly back at slavery, because at least there, you were fed. 

I love that one of the powerhouses of the Old Testament, Moses, was the first to experience change management.  Moses was the first in what would become millennia of rabbis, pastors, and faith leaders who will hear, “I wish things were like they used to be!”  All those leaders have come to know that the hardest part about change is experiencing the discomfort of the new, next thing.  Any trace of difficulty or adjustment immediately sends people into romanticizing the way things used to be – remembering only the good of the past, and not all the equally bad or much worse parts of the past. 

As I think about the ungrateful and unbalanced perspective of the people of God, I wonder what things we are romanticizing in our lives.  What change are we bemoaning without appreciating all the ill we left behind – and some of the really great things in this new reality?  The good news is that we have a responsive God.  Despite the Israelites’ moaning, God provides them food that they need – even if that food came in a different form.  Our promise is the same.  God expects us to be in relationship so that God can be responsive.  Our work is to be open to the manna that might not look like sourdough loafs we love, but that feeds us in new ways.

On Realizing Dreams…

09 Wednesday Sep 2026

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Photo credit: https://blog.gophersport.com/non-competitive-school-community-field-day/

This Sunday our church will host its annual “Rally Sunday,” the day to celebrate the kickoff of the program year and all the ministry we enjoy.  Usually that means registration for things like Sunday School, a fun ice cream social, and seeing some faces that may have missed as they enjoyed travels, took a break from “school year activities,” and generally used the summer for a bit of rest and renewal.  This year, our Rally Sunday has two unusual features:  the celebration of the 20th birthday of our “New Chapel,” and the addition of our inaugural “Field Day.”

These two additions have been bringing me great joy as I anticipate our Rally Sunday.  The celebration of our New Chapel’s birthday has been a lovely exercise in reminiscing, reconnecting with parishioners who were a part of the construction process, but maybe have relocated in the last twenty years, and learning more about our history.  The preparation has meant seeing a painting I didn’t know existed of the groundbreaking for the New Chapel, reading news articles about the process of construction, and hearing stories from longtime members about the excitement of adding more space and conveniences than our almost 300-year-old tiny “Historic Chapel” ever has allowed.  The generation that built the New Chapel was able to envision a future yet to be realized.

The addition of the Field Day has me excited about what new future is being realized.  Though the increase in families with young children has been a gift to us in the last 5-6 years, what I have loved watching is the families creating a community within the community.  They have found their own way of group conversation – not organized by a coordinator but organically organized by taking the reins and making the community their own.  They share resources, plan outings, organize events like a community yard sale, and most recently, conceive of a field day for our parishioners to connect across generations.  This will mean that elders will run stations like three-legged races or bean bag tosses.  This will mean parents will get to watch their children play, entrusting the community to shepherd and delight in their children.  This will mean children will get to know adults other than their parents in a playful way.  In one afternoon, our community is manifesting and living into the vision that countless Vestries have articulated over the years.

All that is to say, Church can be a place where sacred community is cultivated, where connection and belonging is extended, and where joy and celebration is rooted in a place that reminds of the origin of all love and grace: Jesus Christ.  Like any institution made of humans, all churches have their flaws.  And, I love watching when churches live into their best selves.  If you’ve been searching for a sense of community, a sense of belonging and purpose, or a place to refresh your aching heart, you are certainly welcome at our church.  If you’re reading from afar, I invite you to consider finding a local church where you can find a similar meaningful community.  You are welcome here!

On Seeing the Kingdom…

02 Wednesday Sep 2026

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Photo cred: Stephanie Snow, as found at https://stephaniesnowphotography.com/7-poses-for-beach-pictures-for-your-family/

Every summer, our family travels to the beach.  But unlike traditional beach stays, we stay at a community house run through the Episcopal Church.  The house has 11 family rooms, shared living spaces, and two shared meals a day.  The house is only a few blocks from the beach and a couple more blocks to the boardwalk.  Staying in a community house certainly involves some uncertainty – you have no idea who will occupy the other 10 rooms:  singletons, couples, families with either young or older children, rooms occupied by friends of another room’s occupants, or grandparents, uncles or aunts, or cousins of other housemates.  Invariably, communal meals and living spaces are shared across generations, often with people who were strangers at the beginning of the week, but friends by the end.

This year, I was struck by the magic of the multigenerational nature of the house.  I watched as my preteen joined in games with older adults.  I watched as an elementary school-aged child reveled in the design of a birthday cake of someone in her late 60s.  I watched my high schooler talk about the local amusement park with one of the younger residents.  And probably most beautiful, I watched as each morning and evening, hands joined together across family and generational lines, to offer up prayers of thanksgiving and gratitude before meals.

Our experience at the beach reminds me so much of the same beauty I find at Church.  I love watching grandparent-aged folks marveling at the princess dresses of our young ones.  I love watching parents of young children kneel next to adults old enough to be their parents – and watching them exchange looks of awe as a young kid asks for a blessing.  I love watching hugs exchanged across generations, older members asking students about their studies and extracurricular activities, and parents welcome in a harried newcomer parent whose victory that day was just getting the whole family through the church doors. 

When folks are looking for a sense of community or even more specifically for a worshipping community, all sorts of factors come into play:  the music selections, the liturgy choices, the sermon style, or even the dress code.  But probably more important than those surface differences is the way a church makes you feel:  a sense of belonging, of affirmation, of spiritual guidance, of connection – to God and to others.  In “church speak,” you’re looking for the kingdom of God here on earth.  No church is perfect – because every church is made up of imperfect persons.  But when the Church is fully being its beautiful self, there’s a magic you cannot find elsewhere.  Come see for yourself, and fold yourself into the beauty of community!

On Movies, Community, and God…

05 Wednesday Aug 2026

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Photo credit: https://www.yourcentralvalley.com/digital-enterprise/central-valley-theaters-to-celebrate-national-popcorn-day/

This past weekend our family went to see a movie together.  That may sound like a common thing to do, but I cannot remember the last time all four of us not only all wanted to see the same movie, but also knew seeing the movie in the theater would be of particular value.  The experience was everything we had hoped it would be:  an exciting, engaging story, the sound and visuals so vivid that you felt the movie tangibly, and a storyline that left you with much to talk about afterwards on the ride home.

In addition to being everything we had hoped it would be as a family and as individuals, what the experience also provided was something I had not expected:  the experience of a shared movie in a theater that is quite full.  I have heard people wax about how watching a movie with a community is a different experience than watching a movie on a streaming service at home.  And while the argument makes sense intellectually, experiencing the difference in person was something different.  In part, I think the difference come from what changed for us during the pandemic:  how, in general, we came to see mass gatherings in enclosed spaces as unsafe.  Other factors come into play:  the cost of a movie that can be prohibitively expensive, the easy access of thousands of viewing options on our computers and TVs at home, the convenience of watching a film on your own couch, in pjs, with the ability to pause for any kind of personal needs. 

But none of that compares to the shared experience that can happen in community – even a community of strangers.  It started with the previews, as I audibly heard people grumble in disapproval for an upcoming movie (Too scary!  Too gory!  Too boring!), but continued as the feature film began.  The smell of buttery popcorn filling the air, and the quiet background noise of popcorn munching.  The collective jumps in seats all around you as something suddenly scared or surprised you.  The groans or hands covering eyes as something gross appeared.  Or the collective whispers of ascent or even outright cheers or laughs when something universally good happened. 

Sometimes that is what I love about Church so much.  I love the shared smiles when a familiar hymn starts playing.  I love the nods of ascents or the quiet that falls when a preacher says something particularly poignant.  I love the giddiness of children at Eucharist that can shake up even the most serious adult kneeling next to them.  And I love the sharing of those experiences as we depart as people say, “I really needed that today,” or “That one part really spoke to me today.”  Like a movie, Church can be both a collective experience (providing the comfort of shared community), and an experience that is individually experienced alongside others (we may not make the same meaning of things, but we were in the experience together).  You may or may not be motivated to go to the movies soon, but I hope you will consider making your way to the shared experience of Church.  I imagine there will be delightful surprises and shared common experiences that will awaken something in your spiritual walk with God this week!

On Loving Self and Loving Neighbor…

29 Wednesday Jul 2026

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Photo credit: https://www.christianitytoday.com/2018/10/just-kids-love-neighbor-as-yourself-mayfield/

Several weeks ago, I had a health event due to the extreme heat.  It was the first time I had experienced such a thing, and it threw me for a loop.  Since I had gotten to the point of crisis, I realized that maybe I didn’t know how to read my body as well as I thought I did.  Or maybe my body is just changing and I now need to read it differently.  Regardless, in the weeks since the event I have found myself looking inward a lot – analyzing miniscule details, observing new patterns, trying new practices, and being much more responsive to the weather forecast.

During my inner focus, our area experienced an air quality warning amidst high heat levels due to fires in Cananda.  The haze outside was thick and we were encouraged to stay inside as much as possible.  I was talking to my young daughter about the haze and the warning, still thinking about my recovering health, when she quite plainly asked, “But what about the homeless people in town, Mom?  How are they supposed to stay inside if they don’t have anywhere to go?”

Her simple question was like pulling the emergency break in my body.  Though prioritizing your health is important (helpers cannot help if they aren’t taking care of themselves first), I realized I had swung to an extreme such that I could only see myself and had paused my thinking about others.  It’s only human, and is certainly reflective of a unique short-term season, but it was eye-opening about how quickly we can forget the maximum of Jesus, “Love God.  Love Neighbor.”  If my relatively healthy body had been so impacted by the external environment, how at risk are my neighbors who are fighting not just the elements, but also a lack of basic needs like food, water, shelter, and clothing? 

I wonder what’s going on in your life that might have shifted your focus away from care of neighbor?  This is not an invitation into guilt.  This is an invitation into shifting energy – away from any wallowing you may be doing (about your body, your dissatisfaction with life, your frustration with the world) and toward something good – some change you can make for good.  Whether the invitation comes from a child, a random comment from a stranger, or the Holy Spirit:  how are you being invited to love your neighbor more fully today?

On GPS and Jesus…

08 Wednesday Jul 2026

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Photo credit: https://www.supermomshuffle.com/how-to-be-productive-in-the-car-every-day/

The other day I was coming home from a meeting and trying to get home quickly.  My GPS told me to go a way that I knew had ongoing construction delays, and so I defied the GPS and went another way that I knew would bypass the traffic.  Halfway through the bypass, GPS suggested another route, but I stubbornly refused, and kept going my own way.  And then I hit a wall of traffic.  I sat still for about twenty minutes with no real possibility for turning around legally before I was able to return to normal speed (and home 20-30 minutes later!).  Once I finally cleared the backup, I begrudgingly thought, “I always trust my GPS to get me out of binds on the road.  What made me think today that I knew better?!?” 

How many times have I had the exact same experience with God?  I hear a whispering of the Spirit to go another way, and immediately think, “No, that’s a waste of time.  I’ll do it my way.”  I get a nudge from God to take action, and I resist, responding, “I’ve seen how that turns out in the past.  I’ll stay the course.”  Or I hear Jesus speak clearly about a call, and my response is, “No way!  Not today, Jesus.”  In all of those instances, despite my lifelong relationship with God, and despite evidence to the contrary, I think I know better.  I try to keep hold of the reins, instead of listening to the wisdom of God.

Now I know what you’re thinking.  God, or Jesus, or even the Holy Spirit, isn’t like a GPS.  There’s no clear voice telling me what to do, and there’s no follow-up instruction about how to recalculate the route in life.  And while that certainly may be true, equally true is the fact that both tools test our notion of control.  Both invite us to trust they have our best interest in mind.  I cannot tell you the number of times I’ve been rerouted by GPS off a major highway with massive delays onto a rural road in the middle of nowhere – praying that GPS knows what it’s doing and will return me to my route. 

Our relationship with God takes some of that blind trust too.  It feels similarly scary at times – almost like falling of a cliff, trusting a safe landing.  But unlike GPS, we only need to look at our scriptural Salvation Narrative, to look at a character like Jonah, or Ruth, or even Peter, to know that God faithfully guides us in the way to go.  Sometimes we jokingly say, “Jesus, take the wheel!”  I wonder where you’ve been refusing to give Jesus the wheel these days, and what fruit you might experience if you relented. 

On Getting It Right…

10 Wednesday Jun 2026

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Photo credit: https://iblp.org/what-power-spoken-blessing/

This coming Sunday our church is honoring a young parishioner who has just turned 13 – not because we want to celebrate a birthday, but because we want to honor the very real life-changes that are happening in the parishioner’s life at this significant developmental stage.  Last week, our Diocese hosted its inaugural Pride Service, where histories were retold, truths were honored, and where one queer attendee marveled, “I’ve never been to a worship service like this – especially not with my priest.”  And over the last six weeks, ten parishioners in our Discovery Class have been learning about the Episcopal Church, sharing their faith journeys, and asking hard questions about their faith and spiritual practices. 

What has struck me about all these experiences from church lately is how grateful I am that the Church is not at all afraid of the very real, honest, and vulnerable experience of being a human – and how the Church willingly steps along side us to help us make meaning.  What I have loved about these experiences is the absence of the word “should,” or any sense of judgment.  Instead, there is an abundance of wonder, curiosity, understanding, and care.  There has never been a feeling like something was taboo or inappropriate for question.  Sometimes just the naming of the thing – the transition, the hurt, the journey, or the longing – has been incredibly liberating and affirming.

So many times, the Church has gotten it wrong – has been an agent of judgment, exclusion, and hurt.  I have talked with many people who left the Church for a time (or permanently) because of such experiences.  Knowing that truth, I have been feeling especially grateful for a church who tries to be better – who acknowledges her faults and failings, and actively seeks to live in truth and love. 

I know many of you have stepped away from Church or have been hurt enough times by the Church that you are no longer interested in finding community there.  Know that you are loved and missed.  Also know that wherever you are on your spiritual journey, there are communities of faith who are working to be better – to be more loving, to be more affirming, to be more Christ-like.   For all of us, I lift up Thomas Merton’s prayer:

My Lord God, I have no idea where I am going.  I do not see the road ahead of me.  I cannot know for certain where it will end.  Nor do I really know myself, and the fact that I think I am following Your will does not mean that I am actually doing so.  But I believe that the desire to please You does in fact please You.  And I hope I have that desire in all that I am doing.  I hope that I will never do anything apart from that desire.  And I know that, if I do this, You will lead me by the right road, though I may know nothing about it.  Therefore I will trust You always though I may seem to be lost and in the shadow of death.  I will not fear, for You are ever with me, and You will never leave me to face my perils alone.  Amen.[i]

[i] Thomas Merton, “A Prayer of Unknowing,” Thoughts in Solitude (New York:  Farrar, Straus & Cudahy, 1958), 79.