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Sermon – Genesis 12.1-4a, L2, YA, March 16, 2014

19 Wednesday Mar 2014

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Abram, blessing, challenge, go, God, hope, journey, Lent, pain, Sermon

I remember when I got accepted to Duke for my undergraduate education.  The invitation felt like a dream come true.  I was so ready to leave home and start my “adult” life, I was beyond thrilled to be able see Duke basketball games in person, I was eager to start my studies so that I could take on that big job, and I knew I would have a ton of fun.  As I packed my bags, I felt like the world was full of promise and hope and I just knew I was going to have an awesome college career.  And truthfully, my college experience was one of the best experience of my life on so many levels – one where I learned so much more than I expected, I made lifelong friends, I experienced my first sense of call to ministry, and I did in fact enjoy many a basketball game.  But that first year of college was nothing like the picture looking back now.  I had an awful freshman roommate, I struggled with the rigor of classes at first, I had a hard time finding a group of friends I really liked, there were multiple things I either tried out for our wanted to be invited into that I was not, and there were times that I wondered what in the world I was doing there.

As I listened to our Old Testament lesson today, I wondered how much Abram felt the same way about his own journey.  The very short passage from Genesis says, “The Lord said to Abram, ‘Go from your country and your kindred and your father’s house to the land that I will show you.  I will make of you a great nation, and I will bless you, and make your name great, so that you will be a blessing.  I will bless those who bless you, and the one who curses you I will curse; and in you all the families of the earth shall be blessed.’”  At first glance, Abram’s invitation sounds awesome!  He is invited on a journey with God and he is promised that God will bless him, will give him plenteous offspring and power, and that he will essentially be famous.  Who wouldn’t want to pack up their earthly belongings and hit the road with that kind of invitation?  The upcoming journey sounds like one full of promise, hope, and abundant joy.

Of course, there are a few slight indicators of how hard this journey might actually be.  First God tells Abram to leave his country, his kindred, and his father’s house – all without a map of where they will be going.  “In traditional societies the kin group is the source of identity, economic benefit, security, and protection.  To leave such a fundamental social network is to put a great deal at risk.”[i]  And then there is the text that we do not read today.  In the verses immediately preceding this text, we are told that Abram’s father has just died.  We all know what the death of a parent can do to a person, and can at least imagine the intense grief Abram is working under when he says yes to God.  And there is more that we do not read today.  The text immediately after where we stop also tells us that Abram is about 75 years old at this point.  So a man well beyond the prime of life, who is in the midst of grief, who has probably long sense lost hope of bearing any children should be able to guess that this journey would not be all roses and rainbows.

And in fact, we know that the journey is not as hope-filled as our lesson makes the journey out to be today.  This man whom God says will be blessed and be great hits all kinds of bumps along the way.  If you remember, Abram passes off his wife as his sister several times so as to avoid danger to himself.  When he still does not have any offspring, Sarai eventually convinces him to sleep with her handmaiden Hagar.  Though she bears him a son, Abram eventually casts Hagar and Ishmael out into the wilderness when his wife Sarai gets jealous.  And of course, we cannot forget that Abram is also forced to take his one son by Sarai, Isaac, up on a mountain to be sacrificed – believing all along that God intends for Abram to kill his only heir.  Sounds like a real journey of blessing, right?

That is the funny thing about journeys.  We are not often promised that our journeys will be blessed.  But even when we hope that they will be blessed, the blessing never comes immediately and is often masked by long intervals of pain and suffering.  We have lived that life here at St. Margaret’s.  Fifty years ago, God told the people of Plainview to, “Go.  Go from your current town, your church community, and the building you are familiar with to the land that I will show you.  I will make of you a great church, and I will bless you, and make your name great, so that you will be a blessing.”  At least, that is how the histories read about St. Margaret’s.  Full of hope and expectation, large groups of people gathered first in an American Legion Hall and then in a semi-completed church building.  It was a time of anticipation and promise, and the people went.  Of course, no one could know what the next fifty years would hold – a slew of clergy, some staying longer than others; church growth and church decline; building challenges and times of construction to fix old problems; new adventures like a church cemetery; painful arguments with severed relationships; new friendships that will last a lifetime; a young rector who is not only a woman, but who also gets pregnant while she serves.  When God said, “Go,” who would have ever guessed the journey would play out the way the journey has.

Sometimes our Lenten journeys have that same feel.  We fill ourselves with pancakes, and then the next day, kneel with resolve to take on some discipline.  We look forward to the blessings of Lent – the intimacy with God the journey will bring, the learning will we do, the peace we will gain, or even the couple of pounds we might lose.  And when we hear a story like the Old Testament lesson today, we feel pumped up and ready for an exciting journey.  We may even imagine God making similar promises to us:  You will be blessed in this Lenten journey.  And yet, if we think back to any Lent in the past, we might remember how difficult our discipline became by week four or five.  We might remember how that cool discipline we chose did not really turn out to be as great as we imagined.  And depending on how stable we were at the time, that sense of failure could have brought more of a sense of curse than blessing.

How do we know that blessing awaits and what do we do in the meantime?  What do we do when those days come – because they will – when we feel discouraged and lose that sense of promise and hope that God gives today?  If we look to Abram, we see that our only option is to go – to keep putting one foot in front of the other.  The lesson today says, “So Abram went, as the Lord had told him.”  The journey for Abram is risky, full of potholes, and ultimately full of some wild twists that might have turned Abram back at any point.  And yet, “Abram went.”  We are lucky enough to know that Abram becomes Abraham – the man that would eventually become a father of entire people – in fact of several faith traditions.  But Abraham never got to see the fullness of that blessing.  His life was more one of blessing in hindsight, not really an everyday blessing-fest.

In some ways, that is all we can do too.  God constantly calls us into a journey – whether during Lent or in whole phases of life.  God promises to bless us and love us along the way.  But we know the journey will be hard at times, and leave us feeling discouraged.  And when that happens, all we can do is put one foot in front of the other, and keep on going.  Of course, we have each other along the way, much like Abram had Lot.  In fact, the last words of today’s lesson are, “and Lot went with him.”  So whether you are in that blessed state of bliss, or you are already struggling in your steps, God still tells you to go.  Our response is difficult, intimidating, and profound, but also extremely simple.  We go, knowing God is with us.  Amen.


[i] Carol A. Newsom, “Exegetical Perspective,” Feasting on the Word, Yr. A., Vol. 2 (Louisville: Westminster John Knox Press, 2010), 53.

Sermon – Luke 2.1-20, CE, YA, December 24, 2013

08 Wednesday Jan 2014

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birth, good, hope, identity, Jesus, Joseph, Mary, narrative, promise, story

How many of you know the story of your birth?  My mother tells me that I came three weeks late!  Doctors will not even let mothers go that late nowadays.  Even at three weeks late, my mom still had to be induced, have her water broken, and then eventually have a c-section.  My sister-in-law, on the other hand, came very early.  She was so early that she had to stay in the hospital for a very long time.  She had a long tough road, including having her brother give her chicken pox while she was in the NICU.  But eventually, she came home and grew into a healthy child.  There are countless other stories like this:  kids who came so fast that their mothers delivered in a car, kids delivered at home before even a midwife could arrive, or even kids being born on a plane.

We all have a birth story.  Some are more dramatic than others, but all are unique to us and usually our parents tell us the story year after year.  What is funny is that many would argue that our birth stories tell us a little about who we will become later in life.  My late birth and my refusal to come even when encouraged has led many people to insist that my stubbornness was obvious from a very early age.  My sister-in-law, who survived for months in the NICU proved to be a fighter for the rest of her life – determined to make her own way.  Some of the children born of exciting births tend to be adventurers or to be spontaneous and full of surprises.  I often wondered if the child born of a woman whose water broke during our prenatal yoga class ended up being very Zen-like in life.  Regardless of your story, my guess is that your family believes your birth story says something about who you are and how you behave.

Today we celebrate a particular person’s birth story.  Jesus’ birth story is another one of those exciting stories.  You can almost imagine how Jesus’ family recounted the details every year.  They knew Jesus was going to be trouble when Mary showed up pregnant while she and Joseph were betrothed.  They probably reminded him of how when the government crack-down happened, poor Mary had to travel with Joseph on that donkey while nine months pregnant all the way to Bethlehem to be registered.  Surely they told Jesus how when they finally survived that long journey, the town was so full that they had stay with the animals; Mary even gave birth to Jesus in a stable and he had to sleep in a manger!  To top that all off, these filthy shepherds came later than night ranting and raving about how angels had appeared to them and told them that Jesus was the Messiah.  I imagine the family laughed and laughed about that crazy night.  I also imagine his family kept a wary eye on him – such a dramatic start is usually a sign for more drama to come.

So if our birth stories say something about us, I wonder what Jesus’ family thought his birth story said about him.  First, they must have known that Jesus would be no stranger to scandal:  his conception was scandalous and he would continue to scandalize the faithful with his radical teachings and way of life.  Second, they could probably see that Jesus and the government would be in constant conflict.  That suspicion is immediately confirmed when his family has to flee to Egypt to avoid persecution.  We know that later Jesus would have many a run-in with leaders who do not like people calling Jesus a King.  Third, Jesus’ family probably imagined that Jesus would always be very grounded and a friend of the poor.  His birth was about as poor as you can get, including those first visitors, the poor, lowly shepherds.[i]  Finally, perhaps Jesus’ family believed that Jesus would inspire others.  The clues were many:  from his mother who ponders things in her heart, to shepherds who praise and glorify God for all they see and hear, to angels who come in multitudes with a glorious song.

Although we know how Jesus’ story ends, we do not really celebrate his entire life story today.  Instead, we celebrate his birth, and the hope that comes along with that celebration.  We celebrate the hope that, in fact, Jesus’ life will be so radically different, welcoming, and forgiving that we will be glad to call him our Messiah.  We celebrate the hope that Jesus really will be a different kind of King than our earthly kings.  We celebrate the hope that Jesus really will continue to be a friend to the poor – because that means that we all have the chance to be loved by Jesus, no matter what our lot in life.  And we celebrate the hope that Jesus will inspire us to greatness too.  Tonight we celebrate the hope and the promise of this Savior who begins life as we all do – a child born to a family who will retell his birth story over and over again.

But tonight we also celebrate our own birth stories and the promise that our own lives have.  No matter what your birth story is, those initial signs about identity can always be used for good.  That fighter for survival in childbirth might end up to be a fighter for others’ survival later in life.  That adventuresome baby’s birth might lead to a life of reaching out of one’s comfort zone to share the Good News with others.  Even that stubborn kid might find a way to push back when others tell her something is impossible.  Our birth stories might point to the types of people we will become, but we determine how those traits will be used.  God intends for all those traits – the Zen-like person and the person always in a rush – to be used for goodness.  Our invitation this Christmas is to consider how God is calling us to use our own birth story for goodness. The birth stories themselves can never change; but how they are interpreted, what we do with them, is always open for reinterpretation.  Amen.


[i] Charles M. Wood, “Theological Perspective,” Feasting on the Word, Yr. A, Vol. 1 (Louisville:  Westminster John Knox Press, 2010), 118.

A Lifelong Process…

14 Thursday Nov 2013

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alive, church, dreams, flourish, God, hope, living, money, stewardship

This stewardship reflection is offered by St. Margaret’s Parishioner, Kim Irvine.  

Courtesy of http://www.churchleaders.com/pastors/pastor-articles/156872-don-linscott-why-i-m-glad-my-church-needs-money.html

Courtesy of http://www.churchleaders.com/pastors/pastor-articles/156872-don-linscott-why-i-m-glad-my-church-needs-money.html

It seems that people often associate stewardship with feelings of dread, awkwardness, and anxiety, when in fact the goal of a stewardship campaign is to generate excitement and energy about the achievements our church has experienced, and share the hopes and dreams for the future.  We as a community in Christ need to have intentional discussions about the financial standing of our church.  How can we know what the needs of the church are, without having these crucial conversations?  This year let’s try not to view stewardship as a time we have to “get through”, but instead embrace stewardship as a way of life; living each day knowing that all we have is a gift from God, and we are responsible to use what we have been given to the glory of God.

I believe we at St. Margaret’s are witnessing first hand how stewardship results in helping not only the members of our congregation, but also those in our community and beyond.  New programs are being developed, we’ve seen new initiatives launched, and the buildings and grounds we are blessed with are being maintained and improved.  None of this would be possible without your stewardship.  Your pledges and generous contributions are facilitating growth and change within and outside our church.

In doing some research for this blog post I came upon the following quote:

“Have you ever heard anyone say, ‘My church is always asking for money.  I wish I could belong to a church that never needed any money.’  Surely they don’t mean that.  Any church that is alive needs money.  Only dead churches do not call on their members for support.  If anyone should accuse your church of always needing and calling for money, regard it as a compliment.  Invite this person to rejoice with you that you both belong to something that is living and productive for Jesus Christ rather than a dead, stagnant organization from which glory of Christ has departed.”[1]

For me, these words were really eye opening; they made me grateful to be part of a church that is “alive,” and full of God’s love.

Please prayerfully consider your pledge for this year; your continued financial support of St. Margaret’s will propel us to do the amazing things God has planned for us, and keep us flourishing in faith!

Respectfully submitted by Kim Irvine


[1] http://www.tonycooke.org/free_resources/articles_leadership/pastoral_helps/quotes_thoughts.html

For everything there is a season…

18 Wednesday Sep 2013

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busyness, change, church, Ecclesiastes, hope, possibilities, season

I have a parishioner is quite passionate about football.  Actually, I have several of those, but this one in particular schedules her meetings and plans around when a particular New York team will be playing.  There is no negotiation involved, unless you are simply willing to meet without her.  Not being a professional football fan myself, I do not entirely get it; but I find her resoluteness both amusing and oddly helpful.

Football season is not the only thing I find myself juggling these days.  This past week, we returned to our full Sunday schedule at church.  We went from a summer of one Sunday service and a leisurely coffee hour, to two Sunday services, a welcome back event in between, and a coffee hour afterwards.  After that, I had a church meeting and went to the hospital to bring communion to a parishioner.  There are times – usually around late May – when all I can think about is stepping into the slower Sundays of summer.  But by early September, I am eager to get back to this crazy schedule.

seasons

Image courtesy of http://inflowandbalance.blogspot.com/2009/11/importance-of-seasons.html

I think part of me longs for the change because everything else is changing – schools are gearing back up, sports are beginning, and coolness is in the air.  I also long for the change because the church feels more alive at this time.  The busyness is not tiring yet, but invigorating.  A summer’s worth of planning comes to fruition, and then the “so what?” begins.  I love seeing how changes are received, what works, and what needs tweaking.  I love seeing the pleasant surprise on people’s faces when a new change works out better than expected.  And I love the collective wisdom about making things work.

This time of life reminds me of the first verse of the third chapter of Ecclesiastes, “For everything there is a season, and a time for every matter under heaven.”  Like the seasons of creation change, sports seasons change, so too the church changes seasons.  I very much enjoyed the summer season in church these last few months.  But now, I am looking forward to the possibility that this season, this time, has to offer.  The possibilities are great, and my hopefulness is high.  I hope you will join us in this season at St. Margaret’s to see what this season brings you.

Harboring hope…

10 Wednesday Jul 2013

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church, God, hope, summer

-Photo courtesy of http://cbfportal.wordpress.com/2012/06/20/hope-beckons-lessons-from-worship-with-bwim/

-Photo courtesy of http://cbfportal.wordpress.com/2012/06/20/hope-beckons-lessons-from-worship-with-bwim/

I have begun to think about summer as a time of hope.  Summer brings a sense of unrestrained possibility.  The days are longer, encouraging us to get out of bed and get busy with life, and then leaving us more time for evening enjoyment.  We tend to take our vacations in the summer, creating a hopeful anticipation of what adventures could await.  We slow down a bit, giving us time to rekindle the hope that we bury in the wintertime.  We reconnect with God’s creation, feeling the freedom that the outdoors brings and feeling a renewed hopefulness about life.

Though summers are often busy in the church, with days full of planning, there is a sense of hopefulness about our faith life that comes this time of the year too.  This is the time that we take to dream and imagine how our life together might be better.  We slow down to read curricula, imagining what transformation might happen among our children and adults.  We look at our calendars, feeling a sense that anything is possible for the program year.  We take time to talk to one another to imagine what opportunities beckon – a process that can only take place once we have slowed down and made space for deep listening.  Once we are in the midst of the program year, much of that hopeful anticipation fades because we are too busy executing our plans to dream up new ideas.  But now, now is a time of simmering hope.

Our invitation is to let this hopefulness fill our beings.  Our invitation is to drink in this hopefulness like a thirst that longs for quenching.  Our invitation is to stoke this hope so that it might burn ever brighter, creating a slow burn that lasts us through the long winter months.  This hopefulness is our summer gift from God, prodding us on to live our faith bigger, brighter, and bolder than ever.

Seeds of hope…

22 Wednesday May 2013

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change, garden, God, hope, love

Planting This weekend our parish will plant the vegetables in our Garden of Eatin’ – a Grow to Give Garden that will feed our neighbors in need.  As we prepare for the day, I am overwhelmed with emotion – pride, satisfaction, joy, and hope.  A garden to feed others may seem simple enough, but this project has been a bit of a microcosm of what our parish is facing in general.  We are a tough parish that has survived some hard times.  The tenor of our parish has been transformed in the last couple of years into a place of hopefulness and joy, but our history has not left us unscarred.  Out of our history, and perhaps with a little human nature sprinkled in, change has become something to dread rather than to eagerly anticipate.  Of course every church, and probably every individual, does not actually like change, but I believe our tenacious will to survive has resulted in a deeper desire to control, and therefore a fear of change.

From that perspective then, you can see why I am so excited about this garden.  This garden represents the best and the worst of us.  At our worst, we worry about using our property in an alternative and perhaps detrimental way.  If there is to be change, we want to make sure every single detail has been considered by every single person.  We fear the long-term impact of taking on a project that will need long-term care.  But at our best, we see the wealth of our eleven acres and want to share that wealth in a new way.  We see neighbors who need food that we can grow.  We know we will get to know each other a lot better with dirty hands and sweaty brow than we might in our Sunday best.  And we dream that our labor might be a tangible witness to the power of God’s love in our community.

So for me, digging into that dirt, and planting those seeds and seedlings this weekend, is a proclamation that we will be the best version of ourselves.  We will take the uncertain road, we will submit to change, and we will open our hands to our God who will use those hands for good.  A garden may not seem like a big deal to others, but to me, this garden is a bold statement about who we have been, who we are, and who we want to be.

Sermon – John 18.1-19.42, GF, YC, March 29, 2013

29 Friday Mar 2013

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cross, dark, Good Friday, hope, Jesus, light, Sermon, sin, stark, ugliness

Good Friday is one of the most difficult liturgies in the Church year.  The tone of the liturgy alone is stark.  Without our usual adornments and vestments, without music, and without our sacred sacramental feast, we are already feeling bereft.  But added on top of all this starkness is our passion reading from John.  This is one of those stories that gets worse and worse as we read.  Our tendency in the face of such overwhelming grief and failure is to start disassociating ourselves from others, somehow hoping to deny that there is ugliness in each of us that could lead to the exact same results had we been there.

We would like to believe that we would never betray Jesus in the way that Judas does.  Surely nothing could ever lure us into such a treacherous act.  Unless, of course, we think Jesus needs a little motivation.  Many have argued that Judas’ betrayal is caused by his desire to push Jesus into the role of a political Messiah – to assume the military power that rightly belongs to Jesus.[i]  If we believe as Judas does that Jesus is the political Messiah that we had been waiting for, perhaps we too might find some way to give Jesus a push to fight back.  Surely we have all experienced impatience and pushed others along the way.  Judas’ ugliness seeps into even us at times.

If we have to admit that some of Judas is in us, then at least we can imagine that we would not betray Jesus as Peter does.  We all know that Jesus has said following him will lead to death – we would say “Yes,” to that servant girl’s question because, come what may, we would stand with Jesus.  But how many of us have failed ourselves and our friends under similar pressure.  That survival instinct – that desire to protect ourselves takes over all the time – even if only in the form of white lies that cover our interests.  We have to remind ourselves that Peter wants to be a better disciple – he does attempt to protect Jesus with the sword, and he at least follows Jesus into the cold courtyard.  Who knows if we could have done that?  So parts of Peter must be in us too.

If we concede some of Judas and Peter in us, surely we can at least claim that we are not like Caiaphas.  Surely we would never look at Jesus and claim, “It is better for one person to die for the people.”  Surely we always stand on the side of goodness – except, of course, when we are choosing the lesser of two evils, as Caiaphas claims he is doing.  I remember a classic ethics case in seminary.  A group of Jews were hiding from the Nazis.  A baby in the group starts crying.  The ethical question is this:  Do you suffocate the child in order to protect the lives of the whole group, or do you save the child, knowing that the entire group will be discovered because of the crying baby and most likely murdered.  Just because one option is less evil does not make the option good.  Unfortunately, Caiaphas can be found in us also.

Perhaps, then, we can still deny the Pilate in ourselves.  We see in Pilate a man who knows the right thing to do, but who keeps waffling, trying to weasel out of a decision.  But we too have had times of indecision, even when we know what to do; because the right thing is rarely the easy or popular thing.  How do any of us fare when faced with a group who is staunchly opposed to what we know is right?  Yes, Pilate is in us too.

Having experienced many passion narratives where we have been required to say the “crowd” part, “Crucify him,” we would like to believe that we would never be like the chief priests who shout this line.  Surely we would not succumb to that same behavior.  But in the last several years, we have heard enough stories about mob mentality to know the power of the mob to deteriorate morals.  People say and do things they would never do otherwise when egged on by a crowd.  I think about that school bus monitor who was taunted by four boys on a school bus.  When the parents saw the video, they could not believe their children had done such a thing – had fallen in with the group.  We look at those boys and wonder how that could have happened, forgetting the times we have been swept up in anger or pushed to the point of breaking.  Yes, we have some of the chief priests in us.

So if we cannot deny all these individuals, perhaps we can at least deny the behavior of the soldiers.  We would never flog Jesus and mock him in the ways that they do.  We would not nail him to that cross or gamble for his clothes or pierce his side.  But all we have to do is remember those scandalous photos of the military prison in Abu Ghraib less than ten years ago to realize how corrupted judgment can become, especially for those who have to desensitize themselves to violence as soldiers often need to.  We all take on the behaviors of those biblical soldiers from time to time.

This is what makes Good Friday so difficult.  Certainly we are devastated about what happens to Jesus.  But more importantly, we are devastated because we know deep down, in the most sinful parts of ourselves, we too have betrayed Jesus, denied him, judged him, condemned him, rejected him, mocked him, cursed him, flogged him, and killed him.[ii]  What is so painful about this day is not so much Jesus’ painful death, but our own participation in that death.  That is why we leave here in silence, and why we keep watch in the face of our sinfulness.

But even in this most despairing of days, there is one sliver of hope for me.  Just as we can be Judas, Peter, Caiaphas, Pilate, chief priests, and soldiers, perhaps we can also be like Mary and the beloved disciple.  Perhaps we could also find the goodness in ourselves that would take the risk of standing at the foot of that cross.  Perhaps we can find in us the one who keeps watch until Jesus draws his last breath.  Surely we have all done this throughout our lives.  We too have set at the bedside of a loved one in their final hours.  We have fought sleep, given in to grief, rubbed a withered hand, and waited through the ambiguity of those last hours.

This is the image that gives me hope today.  I think of the countless bedsides I have joined, as we loved someone through to death.  We have spoken in hushed voices, patted each other on the back, and shared hugs.  We have shed tears, reminisced with stories, and prayed the prayers and psalms.  We have stumbled through goodbyes, hoping our words and presence show forth our love.  We have simultaneously felt helpless, and felt like we were doing the right thing.

This is our invitation today.  We claim all of the Judas, Peter, Caiaphas, Pilate, chief priests, and soldiers in us, but we also claim those who stand at the foot of the cross in us too.  The beauty is that we can do both – in fact we can stand at the foot of the cross more honestly if we recognize all the parts in us.  And we can stand at the foot of the cross more vigilantly when we look around and see the community of faith who stands there with us.  We can lean on one another, giving one another strength to live into the light over the darkness.  Even as we see him hanging on the cross, we stand as a community unwilling to let the darkness overcome the light.  Recognizing the dark and light in each of us, even on this darkest of days, we can choose to stand at the foot of the cross together, and claim the light.  Amen.


[i] George Arthur Buttrick, Ed., The Interpreter’s Dictionary of the Bible, vol. 2 (New York: Abingdon Press, 1962), 1007.

[ii] Jim Green Somerville, “Pastoral Perspective,” Feasting on the Word, Yr. C, Vol. 2 (Louisville: Westminster John Knox Press, 2009), 302-304.

Advent Hope…

05 Wednesday Dec 2012

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Advent, excitement, hope, repentence

I have been thinking a lot about Advent this year.  Many argue that Advent is primarily a season of repentance – we hear scripture lessons about John the Baptist and the call to repent.  In fact, many have called Advent a mini-Lent.

But this year, I am not feeling it.  Do not get me wrong, I almost always feel a need to repent of my manifold sins, but in seasons of repentance, I tend to become sober and somber.  And this Advent, I cannot seem to force myself into somberness.  I am just too excited.

Last year I did not really get to enjoy Advent too much.  Advent One was my last Sunday at Christ Church Christiana Hundred.  I was a mess of emotions – deeply sad to be leaving Christ Church and overjoyed to be joining St. Margaret’s.  Before we could blink, movers and packers came and we were sitting in a roomy house full of boxes and a disoriented two-year old.  We managed to find our Christmas boxes and throw up some decorations as I jumped into to work on Advent Three.  But everything was foreign and new.  Even having our “stuff” in the Rectory did not make it feel like home yet.  There was a way in which that season felt quite lonely.

A year later, Advent is very different.  The Rectory feels like home, and everything feels so much more familiar – where the tree goes, where the nativities go, where the Advent calendar goes.  Our daughter is more aware at age three, and so the anticipation of Advent, and even the short devotionals with our Advent Calendar, is more meaningful.  And, this Advent, I am preparing for our Annual Meeting.

Now, you might think an Annual Meeting is the perfect time to be somber – who really likes Annual Meetings anyway?  But as I have been shaping the Meeting with our Vestry, I find that I am super excited about the Meeting.  We are going to use our time to celebrate what has been a truly incredible year and to think forward and dream about what can be.  The planning alone has reminded me of what an incredible journey this first year has been and how much we have to anticipate.

rays_of_light-480x360And so, this year, my Advent really is a season of hopeful anticipation.  We will still make room for stillness of the Lord, but for me, that stillness is full of happy expectation.   We will still simplify our liturgies, but the promise of what is coming keeps creeping in like rays of light.  We will still repent of our sins, but the joy and promise of our forgiveness is within reach.  I am afraid this mini-Lent will be full of smiles – and this year, I am grateful for that!

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