Tag Archives: Holy Spirit

On the Road to Getting It Right…

03 Wednesday Jul 2024

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Photo credit: https://azdiocese.org/2023/11/the-philadelphia-eleven-screenings-in-arizona/

This past Sunday, the local Episcopal parishes in my town gathered to watch the documentary, The Philadelphia Eleven.  The film details the history of women’s ordination in the Episcopal Church, and the first eleven women who were “irregularly ordained” in 1974 (i.e. ordained by Episcopal Bishops, but without the church’s General Convention sanctioning the ordination of women).  The question of women’s ordination had come before General Convention many times before, but was always defeated.  So, fifty years ago, a handful of women, along with male allies, decided they could not wait any longer.  The film tells the story of the outrage the eleven women created, the abuse and death threats they faced, and the way that their diverse ministries led to the sanctioning of women’s ordination by General Convention in 1976. 

I came into the Episcopal Church later in life.  Although deeply involved in the United Methodist campus ministry at my college, an ecumenical trip with the Episcopal campus minister was my first real exposure to the liturgy and polity of the Episcopal Church.  That campus minister was a woman, and at that point in my development, that did not seem abnormal.  Then, a couple of years after college, I stumbled into the Episcopal Cathedral, whose dean was a woman.  One of her assisting priests was also a woman.  Those early mentors did not just normalize women’s ordination – it never occurred to me that there was a time when women were not priests.  In fact, I remember an occasion when one of my own daughters as a young child asked me, “Can boys be priests?”

At this year’s General Convention of the Episcopal Church, we took the first steps to authorize the honoring of the Philadelphia Eleven in our set of honored saints we celebrate at weekday Eucharists.  In the same city, where 51 years earlier the General Convention had denied women’s right to ordination, we agreed to honor the saints who pushed us to be better versions of the Church.  All female clergy in the room were invited to stand to a roar of applause.  I looked at the other women, many of whom I know and love, and I looked at the male clergy and laity whose eyes and smiles were full of admiration and respect, and I realized a couple of things.  One, it is always a joy to celebrate when the Church gets something right – even if it takes a long time for the Church to get there.  And two, I can be in ministry as my most authentic self is due to the suffering and courage of men and women I may never meet. 

I share all this not to brag on the Episcopal Church – in fact, we still have a long way to go.  Income disparity between male and female clergy is still a problem, as well as access to comparable positions.  I have been the first female rector both times I have served as rector, and both times, people left the church when a woman was hired.  But I share this story more because I wonder who else have we excluded from the Table.  I share this story because I found myself wondering whether I would have risked being one of the Philadelphia Eleven, knowing the suffering that would come.  I share this story because as someone who really appreciates rules and boundaries, I wonder which of those rules and boundaries the Holy Spirt keeps bumping against.  While these may seem like big questions, or super-Church-nerdy questions, I think these questions are for all of us – an invitation to wonder who we have excluded in the communities of faith we love so much.  The Philadelphia Eleven seem to be still asking us these questions fifty years later.    

On the Business of Church…

19 Wednesday Jun 2024

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Photo credit: https://episcopalnewsservice.org/2020/11/20/80th-general-convention-postponed-to-july-2022-as-pandemic-disrupts-planning-of-triennial-gathering/

This weekend, Episcopalians will descend upon Louisville, Kentucky, for our General Convention.  The General Convention is the governing body of The Episcopal Church.  Every three years (or in this case, two years, due to a delayed GC during COVID), General Convention meets as a bicameral legislature that includes the House of Deputies and the House of Bishops, composed of deputies and bishops from each diocese.  In the House of Deputies, which includes elected lay and ordained deputies and alternates, over 1000 people will gather, and about 140 bishops will gather in the House of Bishops.  This year, we have a shortened Convention of six days of legislative sessions, covering everything from governance, justice issues, ecumenical and interfaith issues, evangelism and church vitality, liturgy, stewardship, formation, and mission.  In those six days, we will review over 275 pieces of legislation. 

Of course, General Convention is not all business.  It is a place of innovation and collaboration.  An exhibit hall of vendors is place of ideas, resources, and connection.  The legislative halls and common spaces are places of reunion with former seminary classmates, dioceses where one has served or worshiped before, and friends from professional connections.  It may be a chance to meet people in person that you have only known online, people you have admired the work of from afar, or a place to make new friends.  And then there are the opportunities to gather in worship in unfamiliar and familiar styles, the deep conversations and sharing of best practices, and the inspiration that can come from being steeped in the wideness of God’s church.

Ultimately, General Convention can be a place of great tension:  of trying to accomplish a great deal of business while honoring and developing relationships across difference, of challenging and trying to correct the failings of the Episcopal Church while learning and being inspired to renew our ministries, of taking a step back to clarify mission, purpose, and priorities while narrowing in and aligning decisions with that clarity.  Add in doing all that with over 1100 people, and that we get anything accomplished is a minor miracle.

Knowing all that, I invite your prayers for the Church as we gather:  that we root ourselves in God’s grace and power, that we ground ourselves in the love of Jesus and serve as faithful disciples, and that we undergird our work with the creative, life-giving, wise movement of the Holy Spirit.  And then ultimately, I invite your prayers that our work will mean something:  to the country church in rural America, to the beleaguered inner city church, to the bustling suburban church, and to churches whose primary languages are not English; to the churches who are shrinking and the churches who are thriving; to the person who is struggling with their faith, the person excited about a new ministry, to the person who is worried about the future of the church, and the person who is entirely unchurched.  We bring each of you with us in our prayers as we gather.  I hope you will surround us in prayer as well – that God is working for good in all of it.     

Sermon – 1 Samuel 8.4-20, 11.14-15, Mark 3.20-35, P5, YB, June 9, 2024

19 Wednesday Jun 2024

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This morning, we get two powerful stories from scripture.  In our story from first Samuel, we hear the story of how the people of Israel come to demand a king to rule over them instead of God and God’s appointed judges and prophets.  They figure if they have a king like the other nations, then they’ll never have to worry about their safety and security.  A king will defend them in a way that looks familiar – like the other nations – than a way that feels like trusting a God you cannot see.  Of course, Samuel warns them – you pick a king and the king will take your daughters and sons into his service, will steal your land and produce as his own, will take your property and use it to his own benefit, will basically enslave you (not unlike the days in Egypt).  But the people insist none of that matters – as long as they have a king like everyone else.

Meanwhile, in Mark’s gospel, Jesus has been healing people, driving out demons, saying some things, and generally making a raucous.  Here, two groups insert themselves – the scribes, who try to claim Jesus is possessed by a demon himself, and his family, who are concerned he has lost his mind and want to restrain him.  Jesus is so frustrated by their behavior, especially of his mother and brothers that he loudly states, “Who are my mother and my brother?”  In other words, he denies his very own family because they cannot see the truth in what he is doing.  In these two stories – of the Israelites wanting a king and of Jesus’ family demanding he behave in a certain way, we have people thinking they know better than God – taking matters into their own hands thinking they know how things should be.

I was talking to another parent recently about how parenting is probably the hardest job of all the vocations I have – particularly as a person who likes to imagine she has a modicum of control in her life.  In the beginning, although parenting is physically exhausting, parenting is also manageable in a way that is not so obvious.  For those infants and young children, you have a lot of control – what the child will eat and drink, what the child will wear, when the child will rest, where the child can go.  But as the child ages, they make more and more of the decisions – what they will wear, where they will go, with whom they will spend time.  This is, of course, how parenting should be – the raising up of an independent child.  But the more your child becomes independent the more you realize how the younger years were the “good ol’ days” – the days where you felt like you were in control (or at least convinced yourself you had more control than you probably did).  Parenting feels like the ultimate test for those of us who like a sense of control.

But the truth is, the ultimate test for those of us who like a sense of control is being a person of faith – following a God whose logic sometimes feels illogical, following a savior who says and does things that really push our buttons, and following a Spirit who takes us places we really do not want to go.  And so, we find ourselves, much like the Israelites, accepting slavery, abuse, and the loss of freedom just to get those things we think will make us happy and whole.  We find ourselves, like Mary and Jesus’ brothers, bossing around God, insisting God behave in ways that make us feel comfortable.  Instead, God tells them and us to trust – to trust that God will provide leaders who will guide us in the ways of justice and truth; to trust that even the things we cannot understand will lead to good; to trust that even though we cannot know what God knows, our wholehearted trust in the will of God is all that matters.

So how do we do that?  How do we, people of free will, in a country of democracy where “we the people” make decisions, in a time when choices are boundless and we must make them, how do we become people of trust – people of faith?  Well, I like to go back to that story of Jesus in a crowded room from Mark’s Gospel today.  Scholar Debie Thomas says, “…I can’t help but imagine what it must have felt like to be inside the house with Jesus that day.  I know intimately and well, as perhaps you do, the hunger to belong, to have someone safe and loving to belong to.  Regardless of our circumstances, we all know what it’s like to yearn for someone who can hold all of who we are, and love us still, without flinching.  That’s exactly what Jesus does for the crowds that day. He invites them in, he asks them to stay, and he makes them family. 

Yes, Jesus divides the house, and that process hurts.  But he doesn’t divide [the house] to make us homeless.  He divides [the house] to rebuild it.  To make [the house] more spacious, more welcoming, and more beautiful.  The Spirit of God is neither insane nor evil; the Spirit completes the good work he begins.  His will be a house of healing for the whole world.”[i]

Holy Scripture today is not inviting us to become some mindless, fluff who walk around without aim or purpose just “trusting that God will work everything out.”  God did give us freewill, and God does want us to use that freewill for good.  But what the Holy Spirit is trying to remind us of is that we do not have the whole story.  We cannot see the way in which Jesus is rebuilding the house.  We cannot fully know the feeling of being inside that home where true healing may be.  We cannot understand the fullness of the implications of our desires – which seem reasonable and justified to us.  But what we can see and know and understand is that Jesus is building a house of healing for the whole world.  And if we can stop trying to parent God, we can start beginning to see that God is constantly doing a new thing and inviting us into the family.  We just do not get to be the parent in that family.  And that is a very good thing indeed.  Amen.

[i] Debie Thomas, “A House Divided,” June 3, 2018, as found at https://www.journeywithjesus.net/essays/1805-a-house-divided on June 5, 2024.

On the Blessing of No…

05 Wednesday Jun 2024

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Photo credit: https://toledoparent.com/online-exclusives/learning-to-say-no/

For weeks my fourth grader has been talking about running for Student Body President.  I was admittedly proud of her gumption, but also wildly (and quietly) nervous on her behalf.  She is a genial, vibrant, beloved individual and I feared what losing an election at her age might do to her self-esteem.  But even with gentle warning, she was determined.  So, we worked on her speech and filled out the paperwork.  The “primary” involved whittling down a group of 12 students to three – no speeches or posters, just a raw “popularity contest” among the fourth graders.  Last night she returned home only a little disappointed that she had not been elected to the final ballot. 

I do not know why I doubted her capacity to maintain her self-confidence in the face of such a loss.  I have been modeling the same for her for years – sometimes you win and sometimes you lose.  Sometimes you get a yes, and sometimes you get a no.  These lessons have certainly happened verbally and in low-risk ways, like in card games.  But the lesson has been learned in big ways too – like a lost bishop’s election.  Though I loathed the very public nature of a bishop’s search, I do not think I fully understood the power of letting my girls watch me not only be nominated, but make very public presentations, and then not be elected.

Without realizing it, I have been teaching my girls the power of a good “no.”  Almost all the good things that have happened to me – jobs, schools, auditions – were preceded by a solid no.  The student government election I did not win, the audition where I did not make the cut, the job I really wanted and did not get.  Every single one of those no’s profoundly taught me something about myself I did not know, and every single one of those no’s led to another opportunity that could only open up because of the no that happened first. 

The experience of no’s can be brutal to the ego.  But I wouldn’t be the spouse, mother, priest, or human that I am today without all those no’s.  And now I know that learning was not just for me – it was for my children too.  And maybe those no’s have been for some of you as well.  I wonder what no’s you are facing these days.  I wonder what you have learned from the times you received a no.  I suspect the Holy Spirit has been transforming you so that when you get a yes, you come to that yes as your most powerful self – the self that was made in God’s image and is beautiful and beloved.

Sermon – Acts 1.1-11, AS, YB, May 12, 2024

29 Wednesday May 2024

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Our Stewardship Team gathered throughout the winter and spring and had some meaningful conversations about how we measure what matters in life.  We talked about how stewardship is more than money.  Stewardship is a lifestyle based on a relationship with Jesus Christ and fulfilling our baptismal covenant to provide and participate in the mission and ministry of Hickory Neck Episcopal Church to proclaim the Gospel in word and deed in order to change the world in which we live.  But we also talked about how things can get in the way of our faith journey:  our allegiances, our faith, our compassion, our use of money, our generosity, and our belief that God provides what is necessary for living out our lives.  And so, we agreed.  In order to help us navigate how to be faithful stewards, we would begin a preaching series over the next several months – looking at those challenges to our faith journey and what scripture has to say about them.  Today, the Stewardship team teed me up on this Ascension Sunday to talk about allegiances.

Now I do not know about you, but when I read the text about the Ascension from Acts, I did not really hear anything about stewardship.  Jesus did not lean over his shoulder as he was ascending to heaven and shout, “Don’t forget to tithe 10% to the Church!” So, what does the Ascension have to do with faithful living – with stewardship?  Well, to understand that notion, we have to take a big step back from the event of the Ascension.  You see, the Ascension is sort of a pivot moment in our lives.  Luke, the author of both the gospel of Luke and the Acts of the Apostles, understood history to be “divided into two ages:  the broken old world marked by Satan, idolatry, sin, injustice, exploitation, fractiousness, scarcity, enmity with nature, violence, and death.”  The renewed world where God restores all things to God’s purposes is “marked by true worship, forgiveness, justice, mutuality, community, abundance, blessing between nature and humankind, shalom, and life.”[i]  Jesus’ life and ministry was in witness against the broken world and a shepherding in of the renewed world.  In the process of ascending Jesus gives authority to the disciples to continue the work of the renewed world.  That’s why the whole rest of the book of the Acts of the Apostles will be about how the community of Jesus – the Church – will live:  sharing resources, supporting those in need, living as a community of abundance, mutuality, and justice.

This past Thursday’s Discovery Class was the session where the attendees teach the rest of class on given topics.  One set of our class members focused on the history of the early church in America.  They talked about how the church in the 1600s and 1700s was the governing body of the region – using their resources to care for widows and orphans, tending to those who fell on hard times, basically serving as the social services agency of the region.  Now, they also had clergy appointed by the governor and charged local residents a mandatory levy to help the Church pay for those expenses (an idea I imagine a certain treasurer of ours probably wouldn’t mind) – but for all intents and purposes, the early church of the Americas operated just like the early church in the Acts of the Apostles – living as a community sharing resources, supporting those in need, embracing abundance, mutuality, and justice.  In essence, a community who understood their allegiance to be to the kingdom of God and not to the kingdom of brokenness:  a community of faithful stewardship.

We are told in our reading from the Acts of the Apostles that as the disciples watch Jesus ascend to the heavens they stand there for a moment – frozen in time as their scrambled brains try to figure out what has just happened and what Jesus’ ascension means.  While they are standing there, looking at heaven, two men in white robes appear and ask them a simple question, “Why do you stand looking up toward heaven?”  In other words, God uses these men in white to tell the disciples, “Don’t just stand there – go be the church!  Jesus showed you the way to abundant, faithful stewardship.  Now go bring kingdom living to life!”

That is our invitation today too.  Now you may be thinking, “Yeah, but the Church has changed so much.  We are not the primary social services agency in town – we are not the place responsible for people’s physical, emotional, and spiritual well-being!”  But Jesus tells us today that we are.  That every single member of this community has a part to play – can contribute your financial resources, the gift of your skills and expertise, the offering of your time to make this church a modern expression of the kingdom of God here in Upper James City County.  On this Ascension Sunday, we can choose to carry on the work of Christ, to do our part to turn away from brokenness and be agents of healing and wholeness.  Where will we find the capacity to enliven that abundant life?  In our Eucharistic Prayer today we will pray, “And, that we might live no longer for ourselves, but for him who died and rose for us, he sent the Holy Spirit, his own first gift for those who believe, to complete his work in the world, and to bring to fulfillment the sanctification of all.”[ii]  Not only did Jesus give us the mission, Jesus also gives us the Holy Spirit – that gift we will celebrate next week – so that we might be the faithful stewards of God’s abundance, declaring our allegiance to living in the light – to being the agents of abundance God knows we can be.  Our invitation is stop looking up, and start looking around at the kingdom God has gifted us to tend.  Amen.

[i] Ronald J. Allen, “Considering the Text: Week One, Ascension Sunday, 12 May 2024”  Center for Faith and Giving, as found at centerforfaithandgiving.org, 2.

[ii] BCP, 374.

On Celebrating Life, Death, and Movies…

04 Wednesday Oct 2023

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Photo credit: https://www.cnn.com/2023/09/28/tech/netflix-dvd-rental-movies-ending/index.html

Well, it finally happened.  Netflix’s DVD business closed last Friday.  Now I recognize that acknowledging I still received DVDs from Netflix may make me seem old-fashioned.  Even a contemporary exclaimed recently, “Do people even have the equipment to play DVDs anymore?!?”  I took a good ribbing, but the truth is I love movies, and Netflix’s DVD business allowed me to watch movies that were not available via streaming services.  I was constantly finding new gems, and still had over 100 movies in my queue that I hoped to watch some day.

For those of us old-timers still watching DVDs, the closing of Netflix’s DVD branch has been tinged with nostalgia and a tiny bit of grief.  Over the course of 18 years, I watched 667 films, each story sparking my imagination, eliciting pleasure, sorrow, excitement, indignation, laughter, and hope.  Obviously there will be other ways for me to revel in the artistry of filmmaking, but there is a certain finality to the closing of this chapter. 

Despite my wistfulness, I commend Netflix for the way they have handled this change.  Instead of wallowing in grief, or attempting to apologize for market changes beyond their control, instead, they have handled this “death” with grace and joy.  Knowing the closing was coming, this year they used their iconic mailing envelopes to feature celebratory artwork honoring how a whole generation has been shaped by their service.  On the week of their closure, the sent a “gift” to every member – a summary of the highlights of our membership – what movies we had watched each year, milestones in our membership, and even the list of movies in our queue in case we want to find another way to see them.  Instead of a death, it has felt like a celebration of life.

In a lot of ways, it has reminded me of the ways the Episcopal Church approaches death.  When someone we love passes, we use the burial office to celebrate life – certainly the life of the one who has died, but especially the promise of eternal life promised in Jesus Christ.  But I’ve been thinking about it over this last week, and the Church honors “mini-deaths” all the time:  the ending of a ministry that is no longer needed or effectively utilized, the retirement of a ministry leader after a successful tenure, or the blessing of a parishioner or staff member who moves away from the community.  All those transitions can be hard because they make us remember fondly the ways ministry blessed us in the past.  But those transitions are also often the source of new life:  a new ministry we could never have imagined five years ago, a new leader whose fresh ideas opens up new opportunities, and new members who shape and mold us into a new community.

I wonder what things feel like they are dying in your life right now – what things you thought would always be there are undergoing change.  Where might the Holy Spirit be inviting you to see new shoots of growth in the midst of something withering on the vine?  How might those “mini-deaths,” be tremendous gifts to you or your community?  How might we take a cue from Netflix, and find ways to celebrate those endings with dignity and joy?  I am grateful for the ways a secular business is helping me see the sacred in our own life cycles.  Let’s celebrate together!

On Enjoying the Walk…

14 Friday Jul 2023

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He gives power to the faint, and to him who has no might he increases strength.  Even youths shall faint and be weary, and young men shall fall exhausted; but they who wait for the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint.  (Isaiah 40.29-31, ESV)

Photo credit: https://www.henryford.com/blog/2023/05/10-ways-walk-better-health

I was reading today about a running method many marathon users use to help them sustain their pacing.  It’s called the “run/walk method.”  To sustain pacing for the marathon, a runner could choose to run for five minutes and walk for one throughout the race.  The challenge for the runner is to use this method throughout, especially at the beginning, when adrenaline is running high and it may feel like capitalizing on energy is a good idea.  Instead, keeping the run/walk pattern allows for the stamina for many runners to complete the race.[i] 

I’ve been thinking that my sabbatical has been utilizing the run/walk method by accident.  The twelves weeks had included multiple trips, punctuated by periods of 4-5 days at home between trips.  This week, one of those trips was cancelled due to weather complications, so my “walking” time at home has been more like 9-10 days.  Initially I was irritated by this disruption in my rhythm.  But as I lived this week a little differently, and as observations about the week have percolated up from family members, I have realized the gift of this rhythm disruption.

In the midst of this rhythm disruption, I have been able to more leisurely take naps and rest – something I would have limited if I knew I was approaching another “running” cycle.  I have also been able to be more thoughtful about time with family – whether an impromptu lunch with a kid at home, going to a community show with a kid instead of encouraging my spouse to do so, and just having some fun together time.  I’ve also been able to create quiet time in town – finding a place to tuck away in my local library.  It has not been the week I planned, but in many ways, it has been a week of blessings – certainly blessings I wouldn’t have enjoyed were I not on sabbatical in the first place.

I wonder what rhythm disruptions God has been gifting you lately.  Have you noticed them?  Have you been able to see them as invitations instead of annoyances?  I suspect the Holy Spirit does a lot more disrupting that we regularly notice.  Our invitation today is to settle down into a walk to see where the Spirit will guide us.

[i] As relayed by Curtis Zackery, in his book Finding Soul Rest:  40 Days of Connecting with Christ (Bellingham, WA:  Kirkdale Press, 2020), 52-53.

Sabbatical Journey…On Weariness and Gratitude

01 Saturday Jul 2023

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Montana Driving (reuse with permission)

Today was a driving day for our cross-country trip – perhaps the longest driving day of the trip.  All told, we were on the road, with multiple stops, for about 10-11 hours.  By the last hour, I was engaged in an inner complaint fest:  the trip felt like forever, I was stiff from the ride, and I just wanted to be in the next location and stretch my legs.  But when we arrived, I was glad I had kept my complaining to myself.  First my younger child exclaimed, “That wasn’t so bad!  It went by kind of quickly!”  My husband agreed, “Yeah, that was an easy drive!”  My elder child confessed, “I kind of like driving days.  They’re like ‘chill’ days.” 

Their comments helped me reflect on the day a little differently.  I tried to remember all the good things about the day:  the way the heavy fog slowly lifted to reveal beautifully green mountain scenery with rivers and tall pines; how fun it was to drive along winding road, hugging the curves; the pops of color that wildflowers brought to the drive; the fun road trip games we played, where everyone was winning at different points; the laughter, the naps, and adding a new state to our list of visited states.

Today, I am grateful for the invitation into gratitude.  It’s a practice I encourage all the time, but one that is easily forgotten when we are tired, weary, and cranky.  But the funny thing is that gratitude is the best antidote to us who are tired, weary, and cranky.  When we give thanks, we see all the good things that made us tired.  When we offer gratitude to God, our weariness is held like soft mattress.  When we give ourselves to thankfulness, crankiness is melted into praise.

I would love to hear what you are grateful for today.  How has God shown up in surprising ways?  How has the Holy Spirit spoken grace through people in your life?  How is Jesus inviting you into a new interpretation of the day?  I’m grateful for you and our journey together in gratitude!

Sabbatical Journey…On Seeing through Song

28 Wednesday Jun 2023

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Chapel of the Transfiguration, Episcopal, Grand Teton National Park (reuse with permission only)

After a day of exploring the magnificent Grand Tetons, seeing beautiful waterfalls, peaceful lakes and rivers, we closed the day with a covered wagon dinner and show.  I had been pondering the beauty of this day, when the western quartet closed the show with the old hymn, “How Great Thou Art.”  If you are not familiar with the hymn, the lyrics are:

O Lord my God, when I in awesome wonder
Consider all the works Thy hands have made,
I see the stars, I hear the rolling thunder,
Thy pow’r thru-out the universe displayed!

Chorus
Then sings my soul, my Savior God, to Thee;
How great Thou art, how great Thou art!
Then sings my soul, my Savior God, to Thee;
How great Thou art, how great Thou art!

When thru the woods and forest glades I wander
And hear the birds sing sweetly in the trees,
When I look down from lofty mountain grandeur
And hear the brook and feel the gentle breeze,

Repeat Chorus

I could not have asked for a better summary of this day.  As I saw the enormity of the mountains, I stood I awesome wonder.  As I listened to a different familiar hymn being played in rustic chapel, I remember thinking I could look at the views all day from that beautiful space.  As I watched the calm lake, I marveled at the reflection of God’s creation.  As I heard the roar of waterfalls, I felt in my chest the way that God’s love sometimes roaringly overpowers me.  And as the mist of the falls kissed my face, I remember thinking, “My God, how great thou art!”

Sometimes words fail me, especially when encountering so much of God’s inspiring creation.  So often, the artistry of song has helped me shape words my mouth could not.  Tonight, singing that song “How Great Thou Art,” with the help of guitars and a fiddle, I knew immediately those were the words I could not articulate all day.  Other times, sacred songs have come to me in sorrow, in anxiety, and in longing.  I hardly ever choose the songs.  And sometimes I must sit in silence for a long while before the songs pop into my head.  In these times, the songs feel like gifts from God, who knows I need a way to express the inexpressible.

What songs are you longing to hear?  I would love to hear how the Holy Spirit has flitted through your longing heart and given you a song.       

Sabbatical Journey…On Reframing Puzzles

25 Sunday Jun 2023

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Las Vegas Sign (Photo Credit: Jennifer Andrews-Weckerly; reuse with permission)

Tonight, we were able to squeeze in a magic show in our short trip with family in Las Vegas.  Perhaps my favorite part of the show was a puzzle trick.  Jen Kramer, the magician, showed us a puzzle, surrounded by a frame.  She removed the frame, showing us how it was solid.  Then she pulled the magnetic puzzle pieces apart, encouraging us to imagine each piece as a part of lives that define who we are:  special transformative moments, meeting a mentor or a love interest, our family or friends, and on and on.  She reassembled the pieces, and then reminded us that sometimes other pieces are added that don’t quite fit – perhaps a challenge that we cannot quite overcome.  Then she rearranged the pieces and somehow managed to get them back into a perfect square.  The idea is that the challenges and failures of life shape who we are just as much as the blessings.  But the master trick was that when she went to put the frame back on, the puzzle still fit into the frame with the new pieces – the challenge or failure we didn’t plan absorbed into the whole of ourselves.

I loved this metaphor for life in general.  How often do we see hurdles and challenges as something to be glossed over or hidden away:  the diagnosis we struggled to overcome, the job we didn’t get, the lover we lost?  Too often, we see those things as something outside ourselves, as though because we didn’t “win” them, they exist outside of ourselves.  But those challenges and failures are just as much a part of who we are as all the good parts.  Invariably, those no’s lead to shifts in who we are – sometimes helping us find a yes we did not know to pursue.  Sometimes those losses make us appreciate our gains in life.  Sometimes those hurts help us learn to heal into something stronger.

Living in Sin City for the last 36 hours, I have been thinking a lot about poor decisions, losses of all kinds, and regretted behavior.  But much like that magnetic puzzle, I do not think repentance is something that whitewashes our lives before God.  Repentance is about acknowledging how the bad in life has impacted us and those around us as much as the blessings in life.  Though we might want to hide those seeming failures from everyone else, God walks with us through the good, the bad, and the ugly – and offers to make us whole again, managing not to erase parts of us, but to redeem us and use the not so good to shape us into even better selves. 

I wonder what part of your life seems to not “fit” into your perfectly framed life?  How might the Holy Spirit be inviting you to reimagine your “frame,” so that others might not see the posed picture of you, but the full, vulnerable, real picture of you?  Your invitation today is to love all the parts of you that can squeeze into your otherwise perfect frame.  Perhaps the parts that you want to purge might actually become the parts that help others frame their imperfect lives.